Nausea

It is indeed ironic how one can find more about one’s own existence in the midst of boredom, but the same also goes when one lives life at the edge. Take risks; it’ll open up hidden doors of your true self. Be sincere, be affirmative.

We must create our own system of thought to free ourselves from the enslavement of the Other. There should be no reason to neglect our inner urges, it what makes us human. I am sick of how people misjudge others for their own actions. It leads to a certain individual contemplating on their decisions, later, their own life. What makes it hard is how we are trapped and forced to live with each other. We must then pretend. Lying is a necessary defense mechanism of human beings. But must it always be necessary?

I have done a lot of things that the majority would call stupid… some could tolerate, understand, provoke. Before then, even I thought they were wrong choices, and they may very well be, not because it disregarded the ethics of the norm, nor was it immoral to the utility. No, not that. They were wrong choices because I’ve altered my choices; I’ve obstructed my own passions, because of my insecurities of other people. And I was left to suffer a false suffering.

Recently, I’ve let the beast inside out… again. And for the next few days I’ve felt remorse and regret. But should I? I’ve acted upon desire rather than phony celebration. I should rejoice my freedom. The HELL with the OTHER. They could think what they’d like to think. I was me then, and it takes courage to be yourself.

To exist is to be, to be is to live, to live is to be yourself, and to be yourself, you must let go.